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While the great escape artist was known for being able to free himself from some pretty tight squeezes, the odds are his wang didn't have its own road show where it did the same thing.

Nonetheless this product exists, apparently for the sole purpose of slapping what appears to be roughly 10 pounds of leftover steel plumbing bits to your unit, just so you can't fiddle with it.

Breast enhancement is nothing new in our world, but if you look closely at this picture using your keen detective skills, you may notice something is amiss.

Indeed, these appear to be some sort of strap-on boobies for men. Because what's the fun of putting on grandma's support hose and her best Sunday dress if you don't have the jugs to match?

There was a scene in Billy Madison when Adam Sandler is talking to a kid when he first gets to high school and the kid says "I was a loser in denial too.

Until the lacrosse team stuck a parking cone up my ass. So did the designers of this toy. But unlike you, they thought it was an awesome idea.

Sex toys are often sold under the guise of bringing couples together and based on experiences we've repressed from summer camp in our teen years, we feel confident saying that few things get you closer to another human than an anal speculum.

Sometimes you get to the point where the standard human dong just doesn't do it for you, no matter how unrealistic the proportions. For those people, the caring deviants in the fake dong industry put their skills to work in making a dildo modeled after the junk of an orca whale.

Did you happen to have a Space Hopper when you were a kid? And were you hoping someone could make your childhood memories of that toy disturbed and traumatic?

Today is your lucky day. This delightful little inflatable foot stool is designed with a flat bottom, so no more falling down and breaking bones then having to call the EMTs and explain you were just dusting when you slipped and somehow got this jammed in your nether regions.

As best we can tell, this must be some kind of boxing glove they must call it "fisting" in Europe. But why would this be in a catalog of sex toys?

It is a scientific fact that every human being will, at one time or another, have a sexual fantasy in which they're that really weird Gremlin from Gremlins 2 that got turned into electricity and stuck in the phone lines.

It was for that reason that this product was made. Now, without having to involve any Mogwai at all, you too can electrocute the living shit out of yourself, your partner, the cat, the mailman, or anyone else you can chase down and grab hold of.

As an added bonus, it will all be super sexy. Not intended for use for those with a cardiac pacemaker or if you are pregnant.

See, sex toys don't have to be all about you. They can just as easily be used to give pleasure to another, like, say, your best friend.

This may or may not be stuck at the concept phase, but face it, it's probably the coolest looking dog toy you've ever seen. Of all the products here most likely to inspire a horror movie, this has to be at the top of the list.

What the hell could be scarier than a disembodied, licking tongue? You stumble into your bathroom at night, open the medicine cabinet and then this thing comes squirming out at you, just The OhMiBod we have to assume that "iCum" was already trademarked is a way for all of us to climax along with the latest Beyonce single, and who wouldn't want that?

The should-have-been-named-iCum just buzzes and throbs along to the beat of whatever you're listening to on your iPod, which makes us wonder if you can hook it up to a video iPod and watch porn on the bus, thus making yourself the creepiest degenerate to ever walk the earth.

Inexplicably mixing an innocent children's bath tub toy with the debauched needs of a something "Cathy" fan, someone came up with this cute little vibrating dildo duck.

Worse yet, it comes in a tiny travel size, for when you plan on leaving home but just don't have the space for your gigantic, novelty duck vibrator in your luggage.

Because driving alone can often leave a man horribly aroused yet unfulfilled, the Auto Suck was designed to plug into any car cigarette lighter. Ancient Greece portal Human sexuality portal.

Ancient Inventions. Ballantine Books. Retrieved May 18, Medical Daily. Cleis Press. Fragmenta comicorum Graecorum.

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Wir haben derzeit keine Empfehlungen. Wovon natürlich auch die Verkaufszahlen von Dildos und Vibratoren profitieren. Wie schön, dass Dildos und Vibratoren dabei so treue wie diskrete Begleiter sein können …. Haben Sie eine Frage?

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